Back to School Eve

Here it is. I can't believe it. I've been in denial all day. I pretended it wasn't happening by going down to Locarno beach, watching my husband and his dad windsurf. I played in the sand, buried the kids, made sandcastles, roasted hot dogs and just enjoyed this very last day of summer.

But now the denial doesn't work. The bags are packed, the lunches made, the clothes laid out. Yes, we're back into routine.

The kids don't have a full day....they're just going to register and then spending the day at Grandma and Grandpa's house. I have a full day. It's an early morning. I'll leave by 7 to go and finish up a couple last minute items. Then we have a staff meeting at 8 am. I'll get to see last year's class for about 45 minutes while I take attendance and hear exciting summer stories. Then I get some time to finish up classroom stuff. Another staff meeting at 1:00, more classroom stuff and I'm hoping to be out of there by 3:30 or 4:00. I have to save my energy for Wednesday and Thursday when we will have all the new grade 2s.

So, now, all that remains is to go to bed and see if I can actually sleep. I usually log about 3- 4 hours on the back to school eve. Most of the night is tossing, turning, checking and double checking my alarm.

I'm already missing my kids, already missing the sun, already missing the non-structure of our days. I'm feeling melancholy about the time I wasted this summer and the things on my list that remain undone. I'm worried about my new assignment and the busyness of the fall. I'm wondering if I can really do this working mom thing.

I know God has exciting things in store for us as we venture into this new chapter, so I'm taking it on faith that He will give me the strength, patience and wisdom to do more than survive.

Just like the fresh schoolbooks and newly sharpened pencils, tomorrow is a fresh start, as Anne would say, with no mistakes in it.